From: Steve Miller (nanodog2@hotmail.com)
Date: Fri Dec 24 2004 - 17:28:34 PST
Message-ID: <BAY102-F1984B714E11699B79E0DF99FA70@phx.gbl> From: "Steve Miller" <nanodog2@hotmail.com> Subject: santa uses deeper science Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 17:28:34 -0800
Much of "Santa science" is based on a consideration of the mechanics of
Santa Clause and the kinematics (the physics) of his motion. There are
further issues that must be addressed.
(1) It is not nighttime, much less Midnight, everywhere in the world at the
same time. In fact, nighttime flows around the world, always from east to
west. The edge of night is always moving westward across the globe.
This gives Santa an advantage, since he has to operate at night. If Santa
stays just behind the edge of night, he must flow up and down, from north to
south and back again. If he tried to hit every house in the United States,
for example, in the same night, he would have to start after darkness begins
on the East Coast and work to the West Coast. For him to move from east to
west, as opposed to from north to south, he would have to wait three hours.
So what does he do? Hang out at Mac Donald's? Santa's not stupid. He moves
vertically from north to south and takes care of everyone in a time zone,
while the next one is getting dark.
(2) Repeatedly, in the history of science and human history, an idea
persists, against increasing pressure and evidence that it can't be true.
Then comes the moment where the issue is redefined, reframed with new
assumptions on the basis of new evidence and all the past issues are
resolved at once.
Santa has gone modern. He ain't stuck in the past. He don't play all that
horse and buggy stuff. It's obviously too much work. 60 years of commercial
TV have shown everyone that all Santa has to do is to broadcast. A TV or
radio signal can be sent over the airwaves and received by every house
simultaneously. Santa doesn't visit every household in a series, one after
the other. He hits us all at the same time… by broadcasting himself with
advanced telecommunications equipment.
There is an immediate objection here. How then does Santa deliver different
presents at different houses? Firstly, Santa has the assistance of elves who
operate simultaneously on many levels of scale. Secondly, he simply has
advanced technology that allows him to beam material things to specific
addresses.
Merry Christmas to All… and Happy Pondering the Deeper Issues,
Steve
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